Money, Stress, and Guilt…OH MY!
What comes first…the money, the stress, or the guilt? I just spent the morning on the phone with new women that booked Discovery Calls and Strategy Sessions. The most common theme with money is guilt. What comes with guilt, a lot of stress because you hate feeling guilty, right? No one likes to feel guilty, it’s leaves a huge pit in your stomach that you just can’t shake. Your try to hide from it, you busy yourself with a ton of distractions. Then you think, “I’m so busy so I’m being productive right?” OR are you making yourself busy to distract from the REAL issue you are having with your money, the cause of your guilt.
Are you feeling guilty because of spending too much on yourself?
Do you feel guilty for spending money without telling your hubby?
Or do you feel guilty because of the building resentment you have towards your hubby for never spending money today and always saving it for the future?
Do you feel guilty for wanting to financially help your family, but you just don’t have the money?
Then you give them money and put your bills on the credit card, so you feel guilty again?
Talk about a lose, lose battle you are having with yourself!
What is the root of it all? Well I did some investigating, looking at the flow of emotions, the reactions the women are having to see what is the main cause. During my investigation, I read a book titled Less Stress Life by Jamie Sussel Turner, and in the book she explains that stress is caused from something you care deeply about. It is from caring so much about something, but ultimately not having control over it. Wow, that makes so much sense!
In our Strong Retirement Club, we discuss all of your retirement components, and which ones you can control, not control, or manage. I’ve seen how stress adds a ton of frustration when it comes from trying to control things like taxes, inflation, and stock market performance, when in the end, you can never control them. Manage them, YES, but completely control them, NO.
Your money stress comes from something you care a lot about, such as your husband, your relationship, and the life you are building together. Or from your family that you deeply love and want to support, but don’t know how to do it without sacrificing your own future. There’s the stress from not being able to control it, and then more stress from making yourself busy to distract yourself from the horrible feelings you are experiencing…guilt, resentment, shame, embarrassment. These are all trigger feelings from something or someone you care about. You feel guilty, ashamed, embarrassed because your money patterns haven’t gotten you to where you want to be with your money and with your life. YOU want to enjoy your money today and not feel guilty for spending it. YOU want to be able to financially help your family and not worry about your own future being put in jeopardy. But YOU don’t know how.
The more I dissected this, the more I realized, we enjoy feeling stressed more than we enjoy feeling guilty. We don’t love either of the emotions, but feeling guilty is worse, we all pick stressed. Being stressed will distract us from feeling guilty and resentful. You can start your own investigation now at FIND MY MONEY BAGGAGE!
Now we know what is really going on in our heads and hearts, what is the solution?
If we can’t control it, we can manage it. If we can’t control it, we can control how we react. We can stop hiding from the REAL feelings we are experiencing, and we can finally find a new and healthy way of addressing them. It’s not an easy thing to do, but necessary if you want to end the stress, end the guilt, and find a better way to live.
Step 1: What about money is causing you stress?
Step 2: What is it really about?
Step 3: Identify the patterns that have gotten you to where you currently are with your money.
Step 4: Find new patterns with the help of a mentor or coach. You need an outside perspective, otherwise you will fall back into the same patterns.
The first two steps we accomplish together during our Discovery Call together. If you are sick of feeling this way, book your call at BOOK MY DISCOVERY CALL.
The last two steps is where we focus our time during our Strategy Session together. Ready for your new life? Grab your seat at BOOK MY STRATEGY SESSION.